Michael Crichton, author of Jurassic Park and famous climate-change denier, has done something hilarious. He's put someone he doesn't like into his latest book. As a child rapist. (That's a person who rapes children, not a child who rapes people.)

In March this year, New Republic columnist Michael Crowley wrote a cover story about Crichton, whose fi-sci propensities saw him chatting with George W. Bush about climate change. The meeting had been arranged, unsurprisingly, by political genius Karl Rove. Apparently Bush found Crichton's 2004 book State of Fear a real page-turner. State of Fear suggests that global warming is just a theory, like various other liberal plots.

Anyway, poor old Michael Crowley is a bit worried about "Mick Crowley", a Washington journalist, child rapist, and character in Crichton's latest book, Next. Haha, fair enough. After all, let us not forget poor old Billy Velociraptor, the kid who picked in Crichton in high school.